Every so often my husband Jimmy kicks out a one-liner that just makes me want to kill him…..enjoy. Friends of ours, who just got married, were talking about the cost of their wedding. Jimmy casually chimes in with…“Weddings are the biggest waste of time and money”. This year we celebrated our 13th Biggest Waste of… Read more Casual Jimmy Quotes: Weddings
Thank you for coming to Church dressed so nicely. I have to be honest though….you make me feel bad about myself. Can you not iron your shirt one week? Or maybe have your husband wear conflicting stripes/patterns? For the good of mankind and moms everywhere….. Sincerely, Dena Blizzard Consumer
My daughter is not doing well in Math. That’s obviously nothing to joke about but when she fails the math test and this question is one of the only questions she gets right….you have to say WTF? Who the f is Jim?????
My daughter was doing her math homework and asked me “does six plus eight equal twelve?” I said, “No, try again”. She started to whimper and said, “Does six plus eight equal eleven?” I calmly and encouragingly said, “No, honey, use a number line. You can do it. Try again.” Then the whimper escaladed into… Read more Blah’g: Fourteen
My son Dean takes his bath at night now so when I tucked him in the other night I asked him if he had put his deodorant on. He is 12 now so we are talking more about personal hygiene lately. He said he had forgotten so he quickly got up, reached over to his… Read more Blah’g: Shelbows
Today’s “One Funny Mother” Friday is Kathleen from NJ. Thanks for sending this pic. Oh…the joys of Christmas. I’m not sure what’s more disturbing the kid screaming or the look on Santa’s face.
Dear Kohl’s, I went into a dressing room the other day to try on clothes with my daughter. I did use one of those handicap dressing rooms but only because it’s so darn roomy. I know that was wrong but everybody does it…. A few minutes into finding every outfit I’ve ever wanted, a woman… Read more Dear Co. Thursday: Kohl’s Dressing Room
I asked my dad to pick up the kids from school the other day. He was so proud of himself when he dropped the two of them off at the house. Unfortunately…I have three kids.
Dear Toilet Paper Company, Please stop marketing your toilet paper with words like “24 double rolls” or “48 single rolls”. When I’m buying toilet paper I don’t want to do math.Who is buying 48 single rolls? Where would you possibly put them? And sometimes your “toilet paper math” just doesn’t even make sense. (see below)… Read more Dear Co. Thursday: Toilet Paper People
Thank you, JCPenney’s. Just when I thought I would have to carry my boring silver flask around….
This year, I am officially dumb. I know, now, that I never have to be on “Are you smarter than a Fifth Grade”…because I’m not. If that show was called “Are you smarter than a Third grader?” or even pushed it to fourth grader, I’m totally in. But fifth grader…not so much (unless it was… Read more Blah’g Tuesday: What is a predicate?