Choosing Happiness

Live like these Biatches!

I’ve been bee-bopping a lot lately. I’m here…I’m in Canada…I’m at a comedy show for Jacqueline…I’m at a Balloon Festival. Everyday. Somewhere. I’m exhausted…and happy.

It’s probably some avoidance or distraction thing I’m doing to forget I’m overwhelmed, feeling lost, and still trying to figure out my new normal…but DAM I’m having fun! I used to think that distracting yourself all the time was a bad idea. That it meant you weren’t dealing with things right in front of you…and avoiding that pain means that one day it will come back to haunt you. But…if I’m honest with myself, I did too much “heading straight on” and “feeling all the feels”. I languished in it…and it was killing me.

Maybe I thought I didn’t deserve to be happy. Maybe breaking up a marriage and family comes with a certain amount of mourning?….and man did I mourn. But frankly, it’s exhausting. I’ve cried all the tears. Eaten all the ice cream. Watched all the Netflix shows and listened to all the sappy songs….and, well, I’m done. I’m ready to choose HAPPINESS.

I bought flowers to grow something beautiful in my home. I planted in my garden to tend to weeds and get my hands dirty in some earthy soil. I’ve flown across the world to make new friends. I put in new windows and doors to open and feel the beautiful wind on my face. I’m choosing happiness…in tiny nesting ways that will make me feel better and create a space I want to be in here at home. I’m choosing to sit in the sun. I’m choosing to stay a few nights in a YURT. I’m choosing to LIVE. Thanks for joining me on this journey. I hope you choose HAPPINESS…in some small way for yourself today….because you deserve it.

You know what else you deserve? A laugh. Head over to Dear Di-ary. It’s my favorite blog of hers, translated by Snoop dog:)